Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Photoshop does the trick...

I'm feeling more optimistic today. Just got 250 quid remitted to me as a wedding present, and I just watched the new "Hills Have Eyes" movie which was hachet-in-your-skull sweet.
Hell, let's skip video-games for a minute and let's talk about horror movies. If you're not into them, roll on down the page some.

Let me tell you, I am more than qualified to make a zombie-game due my Tarantino-esque obsessiveness for gore flicks. Here's a presentation of a few superb movies for you guys out there with *BitTorrent*...ahem....sorry I meant 'time to see'.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre
The new one. I loved this more than the original. Embedded in my brain is the memorable scene of one of the victims having his leg chainsawed from behind a washing sheet line, and Leatherface giving a hammer-sandwich to some guys head.
Most memorable scene: The prior mentioned hammer to the head. SMACK!

Dawn of the Dead
Both the old one and the new one are good flicks. The first one starts off at a fast pace, but wanes toward the end. It's actually in some ways more of a social commentary than a clear-cut horror movie. However, it is still superior to the second one, which is somewhat formulaic for the most part. Saying that, it's a great Friday night.
Most memorable scene:A zombie baby being born.

Hills Have Eyes
I haven't seen the first one so the only thing I know about it is that it starred the mongoloid guy from Weird Science.
This is a great movie. It's part of this new wave of gore-out, scare-packed horror movies that you just can't get enough of. This one goes that extra length to shock and has truly horrific and delicious moments.
Most memorable scene:Mum and daughter coming in to the trailer to save their daughter only to get blown away.

Jeepers Creepers 1 & 2
Whilst the second one is slightly better, the first one is still high viewing. The director has made good use of jarring imagery that sticks with you, such as;- two kids watching a body being dumped into a pipe, only to see the murderer/monster turn to notice them; the monster exposing his face to the kids on the bus as he 'scents' them (very nice moment), and the flying monster snatching a kid into the sky whilst being chased by the family. Excellent movies. Probably the ones responsible for this resurge in good-quality horror movies in recent years.
Most memorable scene:Ah..too many to mention

Imprint
Very rare 1 hour Takeshi Miike special, and one episode of an American show called 'Masters of Horror'. To be honest with ya, I thought the Ring and the Grudge were both shite. What's so scary about a teenage ghost-girl with hair issues? Nothing. I see she's even making her way into video-games, which sucks.
No, you could say I was skeptical about this offering, but how can you go wrong when a horror episode is taken-out of a horror series for being too grisly. I just had to have it. It wipes the floor with the other directors efforts (even f*&king Argento screwed his one up, twat). A stylish, unpredictable and ultimately sickening period piece, which I can do nothing but recommend. Though I have to admit I generally enjoy the simple Hollywood horrors more, Imprint is an hour of madness you will do well experiencing. One last thing to mention is the marvellous acting of the lead Billy Drago (Snow from that movie Vamp). This guy, with his gaunt features and demonic grin, was born to do horrors. So why isn't he in more? Come on directors, get him into some good flicks before he croaks!!
Most memorable scene:Kumomo getting tortured with pins to the fingernails. Yowch!

Silent Hill
Wow, a highly original paranormal horror. This doesn't aim to get you behind the couch as much as go for the long-term creep out. It does well in absorbing your attention for the entire runtime. People who have played the Silent Hill game will adore this. It is the best attempt of a faithful conversion of a game to the silver screen I have ever seen. It beautifully captures that mixture of mystery and the traces of ethereal sadness that the game expounded. Resident Evil was cack (how dare they fire Romero when they pawned his invention!!), House of The Dead was...ummm fuck House of the Dead. S.H. will probably remain the popular choice of the People-Who-Know-A-Good-Horror-From-Their-Arse crowd for a measure of time.
Most memorable scene:Without a doubt Pyramid-Head tearing a girls flesh off and chucking it at the door.


The Descent
Oh yes. I've left the best for last. Do yourself a favour and watch the others first because this one is the chocolate at the bottom of the Cornetto. You will benefit from that lingering taste that should be maximised. In comparison to the others mentioned here, I can only sum it up by quoting Lance as he talks to Vincent Vega in Pulp Fiction "These are all real, real good shit, but this one is the the f*ckin madman". The Descent is absolutely terrifying. Believe me, I haven't reacted to a horror this way since Aliens. Everything in this movie is perfect. The cast, the music, the lighting, the residual fear of the whole situation. And it continues to scare you, again, and again, then when you've already shat yourself, one last time. Then finally, the ending is poetic, and yet deeply disturbing and memorable. Watching this movie is like going down the gym for all the constant heart-rate fluctuations you go through. Horror movie of the decade.
Most memorable scene:Can't spoil it for you. I'm not that cruel.

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Back to Video-Games

As I mentioned yesterday, I'm forced to make my death-scenes with some simpler animations. Truth be told, Snakeman's one is done now and it's not half-bad.

I'll post a pic today or tomorrow.

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